| Look closely, can you see them smirking?
Presidents Can Be Funny Too
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"A man who
reads nothing at all is better educated than a man who reads nothing but newspapers."
Thomas Jefferson.
"He can compress the most
words into the smallest ideas better than any man I ever met."
Abraham Lincoln, referring to a lawyer.
"I am a slow walker, but I
never walk backwards."
Abraham Lincoln.
"An Englishman who was wrecked
on a strange shore and wandering along the coast came to a gallows with a victim hanging
on it, and fell down on his knees and thanked God that he at last beheld a sign of
civilization."
James Garfield.
A man who has never gone to school
may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole
railroad."
Theodore Roosevelt.
"He has no more backbone than
a chocolate eclair."
Theodore Roosevelt, describing a friend.
"If you don't say anything,
you won't be called on to repeat it."
Calvin Coolidge.
"Blessed are the young for
they shall inherit the national debt."
Herbert Hoover.
"A man in Louisiana was
condemned to be hanged, and under the state law he was allowed five minutes to give
whatever last words he might choose to speak before he was hanged. 'Well,' the man said,
'I haven't got anything to say - get on with it.' Then a man in the audience rose and
said, 'If he doesn't want those five minutes, Mister Sheriff, let me have them because I
am running for Congress.'"
Dwight D. Eisenhower.
"A man ran through the Kremlin
shouting, 'Krushchev is a fool, Krushchev is a fool.' The man was sentenced to fifty years
in jail, ten years for insulting the premier and forty years for revealing a state
secret."
John F. Kennedy.
"Washington, D.C., is a city
of southern efficiency and northern charm."
John F. Kennedy.
"My fellow Americans, I've
signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five
minutes."
Ronald Reagan, about to go on the air for a radio broadcast, unaware that the
microphone was already on
"Now we are trying to get
unemployment to go up and I think we're going to succeed."
Ronald Reagan
"I want to make sure everybody
who has a job wants a job"
George Bush, during his first Presidential campaign
"The caribou love it. They rub
against it and they have babies. There are more caribou in Alaska than you can shake a
stick at."
George Bush, on the Alaska pipeline
"What a waste it is to lose
one's mind-or not to have a mind. How true that is."
Dan Quayle addressing the United Negro College Fund
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